• Jalissa Lynn

Unsupportive Family 101

Updated: Nov 21, 2019

There’s No Room For Unsupportive Family and Friends 2019” is something we all shared, seen, and lived by this year. But what does that actually mean? Are we really cutting off relationships because the lack of support? Feeling loved and supported is an universal need that we all share. So it can be very frustrating and hurtful when you don’t received support from loved ones. A lack of support can be many different things and experiences. Truth is you can’t change them, but you can always change your view and perception.

1. Forgive

The first thing you need to do is forgive. You need to forgive and let it go. You don’t want to be bitter nor resentful towards your family over the lack of support. The lack of support hurts, but you can’t let it stop you. Forgive because you’ll never know why they’re not supporting you. And you don’t want to hold a grudge against them, if you simply don’t know why. You can’t be blessed and bitter, so forgive.

2. Evaluate and Communicate.

Hate to break it you, but not everyone is a mind reader. So don’t expect everyone to automatically get what you’re trying to do and support you. First evaluate the relationship. It’s pretty selfish to expect support from anyone if you’re not good standing with or it goes against their personal boundaries/ beliefs . So communicate. Be open to talk about it, tell, educate, and show them how to support you. Some people just don’t know how to support. So don’t be hesitant to say, “hey you can support by...”. Even after evaluation and communication has occurred and there’s still no support... move on and build your network.

3. Find and Create New Support.

Truth is your family can’t be everything to you, it’s humanly impossible. You have to branch off and become into your own, if you want growth. People being too familiar with you can kill your vision. So get unfamiliar with being familiar. One way is to network. Network. Network. Network. Be around other like minded individuals. Also don’t be afraid to let strangers support. Get creative and innovative to build your own team. By my experience, strangers in fact WILL support you. If you want to grow, you have take flight and leave the nest.

4. Selective Support

Unfortunately selective supporting family members happens all the time. For example, we have that one family member that seems to receive “all” the support from the family. This goes back to “evaluation and communication” to resolve this lack of support. But also get on board. You don’t want to be a hater, when it’s simply not your turn. You don’t have to be fake, but you can show genuine respect. Response is everything. So be mindful because what you do to people and is what will be done to you. People are people, and it can be messed up, but don’t let it stop you from celebrating someone’s success. Never let the lack of support stop from doing you.

For my final point, do you boo boo. Don’t let the lack of feeling support get to you, because it can all change. One day they won’t support, one day they will. And it’s okay. Fall in love with your choices and ambitions and execute them diligently. Always have your own back, because it’s your vision, your plan, and your dream. Because bottom line here is your family is not obligated to support you.


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